The Psycom blog

If a pizza comes out of the oven as a crispy black frisbee, will you pay for it? If you don’t tolerate this at the pizzeria, why do you tolerate it from your agency?

Marketing advice columns, marketing courses — it seems the message is on repeat, the chords are always the same, what was music in the 20th Century is now like listening to a garbage disposal try to chew up a fork.

Pop entrepreneurial advice books, columns, blogs, all love to say: “Think up a disruptive idea, then go for it,” as if it’s just another task on your becoming a billionaire to-do list, nestled between “pick up some sprouted bread + organic avocados” and “choose Ferrari color.”

Human beings are predisposed to tribalism. Understanding why requires only that you imagine yourself cornered in an alley with a gang of Dwayne Johnson-esque thugs ambulating their significantly greater body mass toward you whilst signalling evil intent by way of angry facial expressions. And numchuks. Run.

We all get it. You have to write the feel-good fluff that will please your CMO, or the board—the marketing mission equivalent of cotton candy. We’ve all been there. But Mondelez marketing team, you did this to yourselves…

Marketing advice. It’s predictable like what happens two hours after a burrito supreme. The typical format is a vapid series of trite, yet herculean steps with zero elaboration: “First come up with a solid strategy based on sound consumer research, make your messaging emotional and idea-first, then leverage social and influencers in a 360 execution!”…